A Hard Lesson

I stood there this morning trying to communicate with an older brother from the Congo. He has had plenty of difficulty after arriving here: finding a job, caring for a large family, learning English. (He speaks fluent French, but my two years with Miss Hayes in college somehow hadn't stuck to the walls of my mind.)

He is one of those Christians that glows. Even though you know times are tough for him, he seems to always have the calm and triumphant way about him. There we stood in the aisle after church, language faltering, but somehow still able to communicate. As I asked him about his situation, with a broad, genuine smile he pointed upward and said,"Only grace. only grace." I knew what he meant.

Many years before, I had sat in an Emmaus Walk retreat. We were singing the chorus:"Grace Alone," when I suddenly grasped something important. For many years I had wondered why God had not allowed me to serve full-time in Christian music ministry. That was my most natural gift. However, every time I tried to move toward a full-time position in music the way was thwarted. Of course, we did use music a lot in ministry, but most of my time was spent preaching, counseling, visiting the sick etc. None of these things were what I would call a natural gift. As we sang that song at the retreat that day, the answer to the puzzle became as clear as day to me. (I don't have many 'flashes of inspiration, but this was one of them.) The words rang true:

Every promise we can make,
Every prayer and step of faith,
Every difference we can make,
Is only by His grace. (See the rest "lyrics to Grace Alone" on-line)

I knew then why he hadn't steered me mainly into my comfort zone of music ministry. No, instead God placed me in areas that challenged me and forced me to grow and reach beyond my normal abilities. I had to learn the truest, yet most difficult lesson to grasp. I had to learn to lean on his strength not my own. Any genuine or lasting ministry was going to have to be through Him. In short, our lives were meant for his glory, not our own. Like Paul, "His strength is found in our weakness."

Here I am again. a guy who was never good with illness or pain looking at a new stage of life and health. I wonder again if all of this isn't also a way of continuing to teach, that even at this point, it is by Grace Alone.